My Fellow Inmates,
The other day I was reached out to by a friend who was frustrated that he had gone to a con, brought a ton of gear, and proceeded to have every plan he made fall through for some reason or another.
He took his bag of gear back home unpacked. He laid this all on himself and was depressed about the situation. He looked at it as his failure, even though every cancellation was happenstance that had nothing to do with him.
Would it surprise you I have had this happen as well?
This has been summed up well by many writers over the years; From Robert Burns “The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry” to the proverbial “Shit Happens”.
Life loves to fuck with us. Kicking us in the teeth, especially when we are down and bleeding, is one of Life’s most enjoyable pastimes.
I see people on twitter all the time sharing their depression over the hardships of finding a mate. Some of them very pretty and desirable boys, who are letting the sometimes futile search for love get them down. Its easy to assume a defect upon ourselves, to feel unwanted or a failure.
While it can feel this way sometimes, trust you are not alone. These are fights and setbacks we all experience. It takes time to find love, and no matter how much you plan for anything plans change.
Keeping your head above the quagmire of life somehow can be the hardest fight. You are going to take punches, you are going to be disappointed, and at points you are going to want to throw in the towel.
I hear people say “This is why I don’t make plans for cons.” or “This is why I’ve given up on love.” I find that defeatist. Even the best boxers must taste the mat quite a few times before they can become a winner. If we must try and try again to get anywhere with anything else we want, why should life and love be any different?
Giving up on yourself because of others is the easy way out.
Life, just like the lottery can sometimes have astronomical odds, but if you don’t buy the ticket then you aren’t even playing.
With that visiting time is over
Whatever you do don’t scream too loud as others are trying to sleep.